Losing a friend is never easy. Sometimes there is an argument, sometimes a misunderstanding, sometimes it's just time to move away and move on. I can recall the piece that was making it's way around the Internet discussing how sometimes people come into your life for a reason or a season. Then they go out just as quickly as they meandered into your life. But sometimes they just die.
Wow. That sounds so cold..."just die"...but in this case, it's true.
I'm old enough to have lived life a little. I've been married and divorced, I've traveled to many places, I've lived on the East Coast and the West Coast, I've bought and sold homes, moved countless times, and have loved and lost at least 2 dozen pets, but I very rarely have lost a friend in the way that I've just lost my friend. She died. And I am very sad.
You see, I really haven't known this person for a very long time...only seven months, but she was the type of person, that special type of person you just grow an attachment to; develope a bond with for no other reason but you have a gut feeling...intuition and the deep down reality that the person was just So. Damn. Special.
What makes this situation even worse is she took her own life. I'm still trying to wrap my head around that one. She definately had more than her share of issues; physical and emotional. On the outside, she looked like she had it all together, was coping and was happy. I admired her for the strength she exhibited and how she took one day at a time, took one step and then another and kept going! She was intellegent and funny and amazing. I know now that on the inside, things were very different. I wish I could have seen the inside. Not only have seen it, but been able to prevent the unthinkable act that ocurred, but I couldn't and I didn't.
My heart is breaking for her family, her boyfriend, her other friends that I never got to meet and it's breaking for all those people around me who go through some type of hell every day and hide it from everyone until one day, they just can't take it anymore.
Rest in Peace, my dear, dear friend. I'm just glad that I got the chance to hug you and tell you that I loved you. I will miss you.